A Journey to Happiness

I am in my early 20's and reside in the most isolated city in the world, Perth, Australia. I was diagnosed with a bilateral, profoundly hearing loss at 14 months old. There was no history of deafness in our family. While other parents focused on helping their kids to walk and talk, my mum and dad had to think about an issue that many parents never even contemplate. They had to decide which culture their daughter should be a part of.

Having Cochlear Implants might cut me off from a community that, some would argue is my birthright: 'The Deaf community' where often lack of hearing is an identity to be celebrated and not a disability to be cured. My parents had to make a decision which was in the best interest of their child.

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Having a Cochlear Implant would mean that I could join their world, the hearing world. But, Cochlear Implants aren't perfect. Everyday conversation can remain a challenge, for instance, especially when there's a lot of background noise and noise discrimination involved.

When I was two years old, I had Cochlear Implant surgery on my right ear. At the time, I was the youngest Cochlear Implant recipient in Western Australia. It wasn't a comfortable journey and road for me to try fit in the hearing world where I am not supposed to belong. I should've 'been in the deaf world' and using AUSLAN (Australian Sign Language).

Throughout the years in attendance at mainstream Primary and High Schools, I struggled with severe bullying, for being 'different' compared to the other 'normal' kids that don't have any disabilities. It was around this time that I had the diagnosis of anxiety disorder and depression, and I've been battling this for a very long time.

Because of it, I believe, I've grown up too quickly and become a wiser, stronger, passionate, confident and humble person. But it meant that I was self-conscious about my deafness, my external Cochlear Implant equipment. I worried about my friendships, dating, job prospects and my future place in the world.

I left High School early and never got to finish the remaining of my last two years of schooling. I hated school and was adamant, with my parents, about leaving, or I was going to get myself expelled deliberately. They were concerned about my future and feared that I wouldn't be able to get a job.

I enrolled in a TAFE (Technical and Further Education) course. I felt welcomed and accepted. It was great fun to be around a mix of diverse, like-minded older classmates. I was the youngest student. I felt happy at not being treated differently. It was a stark contrast to the experiences I had faced at High School.

I no longer cared about what other people thought of me. I started being myself. I've started behaving the way I've always wanted. I couldn't do this before because of all the restrictions and limits I imposed on myself. You have no idea how much freedom and inner peace comes with letting go of your need to control what other people think of you. Much to my delight, I achieved my TAFE goals with three certificates under my belt!

The Cochlear Implant is a blessing in my life. I communicate effectively with it in terms of good listening and speaking skills. I'm grateful to be part of the hearing world. It's difficult to imagine life with my Cochlear Implant and not being able to hear all the blissful sounds and bass music I love listening to!

In writing this article, I'd like to thank my parents. They've given me life and helped me make the most of it by giving me the confidence to be myself. They encouraged me when I succeeded, and they stood by me when I messed up or needed some help. If it wasn't for them and their support, I wouldn't be moulded into the person I am today.

The Cochlear Implant was the best decision they've ever made for me.

The poem I wrote below is to remind me how blessed I am to be in this beautiful hearing world of sounds.

A Journey To Happiness

"I am the master of my own destiny

I am the gatekeeper to my own happiness

I am solely responsible for the choices that I make

I will not place blame on anyone when things don't go my way

This is my life and mine alone, my each and every action determines each and every reaction

I will always move forward with each and every day

I refuse to let the past haunt me in the present

I will not fear the unknown

I will be grateful for what I have and I will not dwell on what I don't have

I will learn from my mistakes and refuse to travel down the pathway already travelled before.

I will not look down on other people for they too are on their own journey

I will learn to find peace with myself

I will remember that for all my problems there are millions more suffering more than me

I refuse to say "never" or "I can't"

I will work hard to achieve my goals

I will not build barriers to prevent me from moving forward

There is nothing that can stand in my way

For every moment, in each and every day

This life, this moment is mine so I refuse to let it slip away."

(The writer of this story wishes to remain anonymous.)

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